How Bathroom Abortions made me reconsider my pro-choice position.
I'm pro-choice...but going on a self-managed abortion "tour" made me more pro-life.
On April 15, 2023, I spent the day at the Collective Power conference at Hampshire College in Western Massachusetts, with 200ish of my closest comrades. In this limited series, I will document the experience.
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Last week, I brought you pictures from the self-managed abortion tour I went on at the Collective Power conference.
In that article, I tried to present the facts in a detached (if not slightly snarky) way. It was an accurate account of what they showed participants in the tour. I felt that level of detachment was important, and I wanted to show you what happened and allow you to decide for yourself what you think.
Although I obviously have opinions about what I do, I don’t want to force those opinions on anyone. I want to give you food for thought and receipts to consider.
But I’ve thought a lot about that tour in the last week and now I want to share my perspective of how it felt to participate in it as someone who is pro-choice…but not THAT pro-choice.
It made me more pro-life.
There has never been a single moment of my life when I haven’t been pro-choice.
When I was in college, I remember taking it for granted that if an accident happened and I got pregnant, it wouldn’t be a big deal because I could just get an abortion. It never crossed my mind to consider the “product of conception” (as the abortion activists called it on their tour) a baby, a living thing, anything more than a clump of cells.
I literally didn’t consider it alive.
My entire life I had been taught that abortion would be there for me if I needed it.
And, frankly, I viewed pro-lifers as nutjobs trying to legislate their religious values.
Ok, I still view many of them this way.
But the nutjobs in the pro-abortion movement are no better, and last weekend they made me do something I never thought I’d do: They made me consider being pro-life.
And I hate them for that, I really do.
I hate that they have pushed the envelope so far that I really feel like the only sane option is to join a team I loathe because they are actually the most humane choice.
I believe options for safe, legal, and rare abortions are necessary.
My reasoning is simple:
As a woman who has been raped, I never want to take the choice away from women. Pro-lifers seem to believe that the day after you’re raped, you just get up and skip down to the CVS to pick up your morning-after pill before heading to the police station to report your rape. Trust me…it doesn’t work like that.
If you make exceptions ONLY for women who have been raped, a lot of innocent men will be accused of rape. So, that’s not ideal either.
We must make accommodations, then, and that means a time period where everyone has the right to make the choice to terminate the pregnancy in a safe setting. No one is forced to do anything they don’t want to do, but the option is there. We also need to protect people who have legitimate medical concerns that would force them to make what will likely be the hardest decision of their life.
Safe and legal abortion is necessary. But that doesn’t mean it should be celebrated. It’s a sad thing.
Pro-choice, I can get behind.
Pro-abortion, I cannot.
And somewhere along the line, the pro-choice movement morphed into the pro-abortion movement.
When I went on the self-managed abortion tour last week, here’s the person who gave me the tour:
That’s a real post. She was a nice enough lady on the tour…but that’s a literal cake celebrating abortion.
That’s gross. Who does that???
But it’s not as gross as their attitude toward Bathroom Abortions.
I’m going to call self-managed abortions “Bathroom Abortions” for the rest of this essay because that’s what they are: You are literally expelling a product of conception into the toilet in your bathroom.
Remember, this was the lady who gave me the Bathroom Abortion tour, literally wearing the name of the abortion pills on her t-shirt to celebrate them:
On the tour, she told us that Mife stands for Mifepristone and Miso stands for Misoprostol.
But she didn’t tell us what the pills do or how they work together. I learned later.
Mifepristone kills the baby you’re carrying.
And after it’s dead, Misoprostol forces you to have contractions to force the “product of conception” from your body. You have severe cramps as this is happening, much worse than an average period.
The abortion activists call this “pregnancy relief” and a “ritual of release.”
As someone who practices the art of woo, I’ve done plenty of rituals of release. I’ve done rituals to release anger, heartache, and negative feelings, even cord-cutting rituals to release individuals from me and me from them.
I suppose you could call a Bathroom Abortion a cord-cutting ritual…but when I do it, I mean a spiritual/metaphysical cord, not the cutting of something that is attached to my body in the physical plane.
When you do your “ritual of release of the “product of conception,” the guide told me the bleeding is more than a normal period.
A friend later told me that women SHOULD NOT look in the toilet during a bathroom abortion because it not just that there’s more blood. It’s that there’s more than just blood in what you’re releasing from your body.
There were several parts of the Bathroom Abortion tour that hit me especially hard and made me question my position.
The first was when my tour guide said that it would be really great for a friend to make a gift basket with everything a person needs to be comfortable during their self-managed abortion.
She pointed us to this list of items - PJ bottoms, herbal tea, a calming playlist, etc… - that any pregnant person planning a Bathroom Abortion would love to have and suggested we craft gift baskets to be a good ally.
A gift basket for a Bathroom Abortion…that doesn’t seem celebratory at all!
The next thing that gave me pause was the idea of an Abortion Doula to hold your hand during your Bathroom Abortion.
A Doula is supposed to help pregnant women through the process of bringing life into the world. An Abortion Doula comforts a woman as she kills life.
One of the viewers on my YouTube channel, who is a Doula, said that an Abortion Doula was offensive to her, and that her profession is not a “handmaiden of death.”
I don’t care how colorful you make the sign or the bathroom decor, that’s messed up. And there are people who are making this their profession, getting paid hundreds of dollars per abortion!
But it was the shrine where they really pissed me off.
These people actually suggested that after a woman has a Bathroom Abortion, she head over to her spiritual shrine to worship herself:
Some people have hypothesized that this might be a shrine to pray for the unborn life that was just ended with the Bathroom Abortion.
But no, it’s not that at all.
And we know that because in the left-hand corner of that shrine is a sign with a woman’s face with her hands over her eyes that says (in small, almost unreadable text)
“Loving Yourself is the Greatest Revolution”
This is not a shrine about praying for a soul that was lost.
It’s a shrine to worship the act of abortion as an act of love.
And that white statue to the left of the sign on the edge of the table is a literal fertility statue.
You can’t make this stuff up.
I almost ran out of the room.
By the time we got to the spiritual shrine to worship yourself after your Bathroom Abortion, I was beginning to feel physically ill.
When the tour concluded, I almost ran out of the room.
I never took it seriously when someone said the pro-abortion activists were a death cult…but it’s true.
They are a death cult.
They celebrate abortion. They glorify it. They make it into a group activity. They build shrines to it. It is their ultimate sacrament.
They are literally the high priestesses of abortion.
That’s sick. And I can’t get behind any push to normalize this.
So where does that leave me?
I’m still pro-choice because I will never throw rape victims under the bus.
But I refuse to join a death cult.
And I don’t know if we exist in a world where we can ever get to a reasonable compromise and return to “safe, legal, and rare.”
So, I guess if the choice is between life and death, I choose life.
There is no other reasonable option.
It didn’t have to be this way.
What do you think?
Has this series made you look at abortion differently? Leave a comment and let me know.
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"Has this series made you look at abortion differently?"
No, not really. I've always been against abortion, but what has changed is I'm seeing now just how ghoulish these people really are. I've heard pro-life people saying that these folks really viewed their killing as a religious experience, but I didn't really believe it. Apparently they were right on the money.
This series tipped me to subscribe to you. You are doing important work. Important truthful work. Thank you and that you exposed yourself to pure evil - that was very hard. I would most definitely vomit at the overbearing message of 'self-love' if I were there in person. Thank you.